Wife caught cheating

Had a good laugh, a joke, a fat lie, you have drawn a blank. You now have found that she was not what you were looking for! I wouldn't handle her wih kid gloves, I would rather put an end to the relationship, or possibly,  pay her back in her own coin, to retaliate.                                                                                                                       Open relationships are not standard or norm in Sweden, not even among successful women. What, upon a promotion goes a permission a sleep with anyone? In Sweden as well as other countries relationships as well as marriages are built on fidelity. The exception would be when the parties agree to an open relationship, but this is very unusual.

This is forum dominated by women. 
You cannot and should not ask the women themselves if they are promiscuous.
In their own eyes they are always angels. 

Swedish women are more promiscuous than many other women. 

Sweden has an unusual high rate of single households - many women complains of how difficult it is to find the Right man which by no means prevent them from screwing around in the weekends. 

It doesn't matter one whit if the whole world considers cheating or open relationships normal.

This is about how you feel and what you both have promised each other when becoming a couple.

Most open relationships seem to fail anyway so I don't think you should waste another second with this woman. Dump her so fast it makes her head spin.

There are plenty of women not interested in free-for-all relationships.

It is not so usual. Though some people have made that agreement, but it is not the normal thing. 

Swedes dislikes infidelity accually more than people in other countries.

But if it is a mutual agreement of having an open relationship, l belive most people in Sweden thinks it is okej, that that couple have made such an agreement. 

Why can't single women do as they wish in the weeekend??

Oh, I really feel for you hun ... good thing you've decided to leave her. I get that you want closure, but tbh, i don't think you should get your hopes up about that 😔

There's nothing wrong with open relationships (I'm in one myself; they're certainly not for all, but if both/all parties agree and have the same take on it, it's just as good as any other kind) - what's wrong is cheating and lying to the person you claim to love.

Just out of curiosity - where are you from? And when did you move here and why? Is your wife originally from Sweden? Or how does she "know" what the Swedish norm is/what Swedish women are like? You obviously don't have to answer any of this; like I said: I'm just curious 😊

The subject was whether open relationships are common in Sweden and specifically among career women, the answer was not.                                                                                                                                          However, you claim that  Swedish women tend to be "more promiscuous than many other women" which is another question and I wonder how you have achieved that knowledge, how?                                                                                                                                                            The subject does not  concern promiscuity as such but infidelty. "Promiscuity" has BTW has a negative and oldfashioned connotation. Women in Sweden are equal to men and dispose of their bodies in the same way as men have done for thousands of years. This freedom of women has nothing to do with promiscuity. Finally, a career takes strength, concentration and hard work and there is no time for "screwing around". And honestly, why should women, well educated and hard working, be interested in wasting time with losers?                                 

Word?👍

Do not feel bad because you didn't understand what she was doing! Most of us, except extremly jealous people, are thrustful in our relationships! And that is a good trait in our personalities. The shame is on her! 

It's also bad that she doesn' tell you all in this matter, but still withold some things. And that she lied and said that open relationships are common here in Sweden. 

I think that you are wise not to rush anything, but instead contemplate and discuss what has happened with other people. You are probably in a bit of a chock right now.

Thank you for the advice, and I have very little hope left after this. The cheating and the lying and the shame at not having found out earlier all build up inside you until you want to die...

I am English, from London, she is Swedish from Stockholm, but her family is in the north. She is very insistent that all woman want this lifestyle and keep showing this Stella Fadel influencer but that is just a weak justification in my mind. Nothing was consensual and it hurt me sombadly I will not trust easily again, which is sad in a new country with only her friend group as main friends and contacts.

People in general are rather thrustwothy. I'm sorry that you feel that you are not going to be able to trust anyone anymore! If you get close friends here in Sweden, you will absolutely be able to trust at least a majority of them.

The only thing not to do, is to lend anyone money. In that case it is better to give them the money right away, or say that you cant't lend them money. People who have problems keeping a budget will probably continue to have that problem. 

Try to find friends through sports. There are runners clubs for young and middleaged people for example (Hasch- or Hushclub I belive one was namned for example) Or group training at gyms. Or aerobic traing at Friskis & Svettis. 
If you have a hobby try to find groups on FB that meet each other irl. 

It's important that you engage in some sort of activities in your free time, even though the shock and the process of grieveing will take time and energy. But to do something outside home and your job can make life a little easier.

I am truly sorry for your experiences here.

However, I believe it is crucial to keep the focus on that many Swedish women are sl-s today.

 This is the downside of women liberation and the demographic abundance of Swedish men, (especially under 40 yo) caused by massive import of refugees the latest years. It is not politically correct to talk about theses things in Sweden but at least you know the real reason without getting carried away by how phantastic Swedish women are if you ask them that is or irrelevant training advices.

No logic. 

True: If there is an aboundance of men, it may be harder for a man to find a women.

But that does not make swedish women more prone to infidelity towards their husband or sambo.  

There have been and will always be men who are interested in some sexual activity (no strings attached). Women have never had to seek hard for that kind of encounters. If they really want to do such things. 

There has not been any changes in that respect in recent years. 

You're welcome ♥️

Yeah, I hear you, but please don't let her break you! After all, most people are genuine and trustworthy and faithful. And please don't feel ashamed! You obviously haven't done anything wrong - nor are you a fool for not having realised earlier. I know, it's easy to beat yourself up and feel you're the most gullible idiot alive when something like this happens but the truth is that the natural thing to do is to trust your partner. That doesn't make you gullible nor a fool ♥️

OP! I hope you will see right through this massive pile of shit. I can't believe someone actually liked it (tho come to think of it, it was probably "Note" himself)

With her extramarital relations in broad daylight she constructed an almost laughable excuse. Her claiming  that sexual intercourse outside wedlock is acceptable in Sweden, seen as "open relationships", is pure fantasy.                                                                                                         Let alone has she betrayed the signature; she has also bereaved him of the "entrance card" into the Swedish society in case of a divorce. A dilemma. A pragmatic scene would be to pretend to forgive her and not dump her until he is sufficiently established in Sweden, However, this takes an icecold heart and patience. The question is whether it would work out, difficult to live under the same roof as an unreliable woman.